I AM. such a bad blogger. the worst one.

sorry for abandoned you, blog :'(
I wasn't suppose to do that.

PR. ulangan. tugas. kegiatan. numpuk lah semua jadi satu. gak ada waktu buat post apapun hoam. oke I AM A BAD BLOGGER :'(
by the way, now I am at the second grade, science class in smansa ;;) XI IPA 6 yeaaaaah.
again with my very best best best friends, JESSE, FAIZ, GUSTI :D <3
love them a lot ;D
I am in at an organization, TIRTA SCOUT with tiara and met new amazing friends there!
It will be so long if I tell you the story.
see ya guysssss

hah?

bingung sama pemikiran orang-orang (still related with the last post)
ada yang bilang "perasaan itu tersirat, gak bisa di ganggu gugat"
yaelah kalo kaya gitu terus mah nyesek doang jadinya. masa stuck di suatu ketidak pastian? yang bener aja?
ada juga yang bilang "ngapain stuck disitu? move on! masih banyak manusia disana"
yaelah gak bisa gitu juga dong. masa mau dipaksa-paksa?
tapi ada juga yang bilang "semua itu harus di perjuangkan, jangan pernah menyerah"
yaelah galau mulu kalo gitu ceritanya. gak bener juga.

jadi?
sakit kalo nunggu terus buat sesuatu yang gak pasti/ gak mungkin.
sakit juga kalo maksa ninggalin semuanya. lagian perasaan gak bisa di paksa-paksa juga kan. hhh that's why I don't understand love

askdhisfksdjn

I don't have any ideas to write.
I don't know what I'm feeling right now.
But I'm sure,
I start to let my self hates him.
and try to REACH FOR THE SKY ;)
I still can't understand why people can hoping someone for a not-sure-relation in a long long time. Why and how can they stand up that strong for WAITING? how can they pass the wind, the rain? Why they have to stay on that someone? Why they won't letting go that person and get a better life? Why they keep that illness? WHY?
I just remembered about Maroon 5's song, Nothing lasts forever.
"I LOVE YOU BUT I'M LETTING GO" I agree with that, that's better than it kills you slowly.


NOTHING LASTS FOREVER - MAROON 5

It is so easy to see
Dysfunction between you and me
We must free up these tired souls
Before the sadness kills us both

I tried and tried to let you know
I love you but I'm letting go
It may not last but I don't know
Just don't know

If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

A bed that's warm with memories
Can heal us temporarily
The misbehaving only makes
The ditch between us so damn deep

Built a wall around my heart
I’ll never let it fall apart
But strangely I wish secretly
It would fall down while I'm asleep

If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you, babe

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Tough we have not hit the ground
It doesn't mean we're not still falling,
Oh I want so bad to pick you up
But you're still too reluctant to accept my help
What a shame, I hope you find somewhere to place the blame
But until then the fact remains

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes you so hard to stay
Nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

holiday just like a flash!

in this period(semester 1) obviously has a holidaaaaay. yeah.
but I didn't enjoy it as well. I don't know why but it was just too short, but too long. I went no where. boring all the time, texting, eating, no other activities.
after the end of examination and I've repair my score, I came to the school everyday with Winona without some reasons, just wasted our time.
I got my study-result on Thursday 30th December and I still amazed with the result :)

Friday 31st December, Aldy invited me and others to watch Gulliver's Travelers at XXI e-walk. I came there with Winona and Taffy my best of the best friends. There are Aldy, Abi, Abang, Romy, Prima, Hafizh, Indri, WInona, Taffy, and I. We enjoyed Jack Black's jokes and acts.
But sadly I spent my new year night with NO ONE, nor my family. because I was too tired, I slept. I didn't have any special thing in last 31 December like others. BUT SOMETHING JUST MADE ME UP, AWAKE AND FALLING this is random I don't know but I guess I've open my heart for the new one ;) COOL!

3rd January, Prima invited us again to join his event, FISHING! yeah after Tiara, Abang, Faiz and I fought over the rain to reach the destination (Prima's house) *lebay* Tiara, Nanda, Bos, Putri, Prima, Ale, Ridho, Givary, Joseph, Abang, Faiz, and I went to Pemancingan Widuri by two cars. we got 4 medium fishes and a little one. Prima's dad got the big one oh no-_- we asked the owner of the place to bake all the fishes, and we went to lamaru beach to EAT them yeaaaaaaah! after we were full, we went to Total's swimming pool. It was our last place. but we were tired enough for that day. we started at 07 AM, we finished at 07 PM. having so much fun with them even we have also much troubles though ;D LOVE THE DAY SO FUCKIN MUCH!

4th January, I had to observe about availability of water for Karya Ilmiah with Tiara. I went to Titis' house, Dea's house, and Nuril's house until 09 PM! the day was so damn great!

5th January, I gave a little surprise for Puspitasari Putri Damayanti, I came to Wisma pertamina with Tiara, we bought a viennetta and some candles. she was surprised! we did it! and I love the viennetta ;)


6th January, still with Tiara, in the morning, was about 10 AM, we went to MOTE's house! we destroyed his house HAHA. and Abang called us to come to e-walk because we've late for THE TOURIST. Abang and Onny were waiting for us. we met Abi there. THE MOVIE WAS AMAZINGLY COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!! Johnny Depp was great! we also met AMOYYYY there! miss her a lot ;D

and after those amazing days, I slept along the days until 10 January I have to start the bussiness over again yeah!

Secondhand Serenade went to Bandung & Surabaya

JOHN VESELY WENT TO BANDUNG & SURABAYA, 8&9 January 2011
aaaaa I want to scream OUT LOUD because my mom just CANCELED my booked-plan-ticket! yeah you know how I feel? random. sad, mad. bud I just can did NOTHING. that's the greatest part! just because I lost my camera. I supposed to be there watch his amazing show with venna :( yeah but I passed the show! I MISS THE SHOW! ah, random. stop writing better :')

miracle

Alhamdulillah, ada gunanya vacum dalam jangka waktu yang sangaaaaat lama
walaupun ulangan pake acara galau-galau, tapi Alhamdulillah aku bener-bener ga kecewa sama nilai semester 1 ku. memuaskan.
ya walaupun ga nyampe 5 besar. Alhamdulillah aku peringkat 08 di Xtetra :)
dan ngeliat hasil raport ini kemungkinan juga aku ke Bandung, nilai udah syukur, tinggal kemandirian aja yang kurang pake banget-_- tapi pasti bisa mandiri, belajar dari sekarang! yeah! *apaan sih?*
jarang banget aku masuk 10 besar kaya gini apalagi di SMA gini. bisa dibilang MIRACLE
I thank to everyone who support beside or behind me, especially for Allah SWT :)
SEMESTER 2 HARUS LEBIH BAIK LAGI! PASTI BISA MASUK IPA SMA 5 BANDUNG! BISA!!!

random

he's absolutely driving me nutz.
I don't know where my soul is. I lost it all. My soul, my heart, my life, my self.
I've failed for FOUR TIMES.
I don't regret it but I'm totally broke, terribly sick.
I gave him everything. I love him like no other girl. but what the hell he did to me?
He left me for another girl. I wonder but afraid does she love him the way I can? can she make him better? I'm afraid she'll disappoint him, Idk why :(
I still trying to move on, I still trying to find my self back.
right, I broke up with Alvin Rivaldi Pratama 28 Oktober 2010
FYI, I love him just the way he is.